What happens between the time you are a college student and a married independant adult? There has to be some kind of middle ground where the parents are able to let go and the child learns how to handle relationships on his or her own...
I feel frusterated when my parents ask after my grades or if I have been eating at the right times. I love both of them very much but I feel quite childish if they ask after these things. I wonder if my perception is just colored by my own adversion to being treated like a child.
Obviously, there is some type of emotional response that both parents and children have to work through as they move out of the house, go to college or get married. A sense of loss, dispair, frusteration, lonliness and general unsettledness might decend upon a persons sub-conscious.
When is it easy to have a transition? Or are emotional transitions part of everyday life?
Wednesday, April 2, 2008
Monday, March 31, 2008
Emotions and expressions
This last week has been amazing as far as emotional expression goes. The chapter has helped me so much in my own life as some of my friends have all decided to have a bad week!
Emotionally expressing dissatisfaction with a relationship one of my girlfriends has with a particular boy, getting angry at a friend for not understanding a Godly principle, and having another disclose some personal information that I had no business commenting on but felt led by God to be honest.
The first one, a girl/boy dillemma. I found myself having to constantly shut my opinionated mouth as a rather abnoxious boy pulled my friend in, more than once, towards a frusteratingly unhealthy conversation. So many times I just wanted to shout, "Stop talking to him!" but had to be quiet due to not knowing if the relationship could handle the honesty. At best, it feels to me like a tenuous relationship so I have no idea if any out-right honesty is even a good idea.
The second one happened today as a very mature Christian friend of mine. She mentioned something about a spiritual gift that I had recieved but she didn't know about it. I found myself about to tell her like 5 times in our conversation! But I realized that this form of honesty needed to be kept to myself for her benefit.
And thirdly, last night, an (unnamed for protection, and the fact I didn't ask...) friend mentioned he/she had broken up with a significant other and he/she stated most eloquently: "I just feel like there is this gaping hole left. I just want someone to love me." It was by far the most amazingly honest thing a person could ever say. I was stunned and my heart just went out to the person because all of us feel the same way! Even God probally feels this! Why else would He take such delight in creating us to love Him?! I felt as if I needed to fill that void with encouraging words but then I was stopped short by a gentle prodding by the Holy Spirit.
"But, you know, it's a God shaped hole." I said as gently as I could. The person lifted their head and smiled a little bit but was obviously still in a lot of pain.
"I know."
Emotionally expressing dissatisfaction with a relationship one of my girlfriends has with a particular boy, getting angry at a friend for not understanding a Godly principle, and having another disclose some personal information that I had no business commenting on but felt led by God to be honest.
The first one, a girl/boy dillemma. I found myself having to constantly shut my opinionated mouth as a rather abnoxious boy pulled my friend in, more than once, towards a frusteratingly unhealthy conversation. So many times I just wanted to shout, "Stop talking to him!" but had to be quiet due to not knowing if the relationship could handle the honesty. At best, it feels to me like a tenuous relationship so I have no idea if any out-right honesty is even a good idea.
The second one happened today as a very mature Christian friend of mine. She mentioned something about a spiritual gift that I had recieved but she didn't know about it. I found myself about to tell her like 5 times in our conversation! But I realized that this form of honesty needed to be kept to myself for her benefit.
And thirdly, last night, an (unnamed for protection, and the fact I didn't ask...) friend mentioned he/she had broken up with a significant other and he/she stated most eloquently: "I just feel like there is this gaping hole left. I just want someone to love me." It was by far the most amazingly honest thing a person could ever say. I was stunned and my heart just went out to the person because all of us feel the same way! Even God probally feels this! Why else would He take such delight in creating us to love Him?! I felt as if I needed to fill that void with encouraging words but then I was stopped short by a gentle prodding by the Holy Spirit.
"But, you know, it's a God shaped hole." I said as gently as I could. The person lifted their head and smiled a little bit but was obviously still in a lot of pain.
"I know."
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